Cannon Rebel EOS Xs

my new camera is fuckin' cleeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeean.

asdfghjkl;

See I give 100%, I told you how I feel and its not enough for you.

I hate how you just run away from things and push me away when things are going wrong. asdfghjkljhgfdssdfghjkl

my decision was to be with you and give you my ALL.

I don't wanna regret it.

&yes I feel like that, SO PROVE ME WRONG instead of just pushing me away.

ughhhhh. I'm scared and paranoid. I have an issue with trust, but I don't let it get to US. I hate US, but I love US. I feel like we're fuckin' drifting apart.

just prove me wrong...

On That Real TIP.

1130 - MIDNIGHT; I can't sleep.. things on my mind just been bothering me...

Have you ever just thought about the past? Asking yourself "what if?" to different things. Well today I was asking myself that. Not on a certain topic or anything. I was just looking back at EVERYTHING in a whole different perspective asking myself what IF.

Looking back from the past, I've grown so much & I still have alot more growing to do. I'm still young and I don't know everything, but all I can do is think about my decisions and hope to make the right ones.

Is this the right decision...?

If I don't will I be saying "What If?"

Please tell me I'ma make the right decision and that I won't regret anything.

cuz I'm gonna put my all into this decision. I don't wanna regret it in the future.

asdfghjkl;....... Why do I feel like this?

Boring Ass Friday

Arigatos w/ Chrys, Vicky, Justin, Ricky, & Pat

hellllla boring. oh well at least i got to see them =P

The Point Of No Return

2G finally. if i want my ears closed, i have to get it surgically closed. ahhhh. haha oh well.

hittin' up fransteez's tonight. post more pictures lateeeer.

;EDIT @ FRANSTEEZ's fuken wit everyones camera phone.

Have U Ever Made Love To A WEIRDO?

I love this weirdo. No matter what. I'ma be around for a while. At least, I hope to... Thats if you let me..

love you babs.

Love Me When it Hurts

you say realize what you want, well I try to figure those things out and when I try to do something for you its not what you want and you end up getting mad or irritated at me. I feel like you don't even let me know what I can do for you. I can't just read your mind you know?

you could question your life and the things you do at times. I just hope you don't question or regret US. you alredy noe im tryn' to make US work.

you know I'm always open for change as long as it makes US work, but it ain't gonna work if you aint down to do the same.

you know I realize everything you go thru everyday and how stressed you get. All I ever tried to do was relieve that stress. And I know at times I don't even realize how stressed you are and I'm self centered and only think about myself. But I don't do it on purpose you know? I worry about US all the time. That's why you never see me mad and you know I hardly get mad. And you know I'm not an angry person and i'm juss tryn to make it work but like they say it takes both of us to work together.


I just feel like you been pushing me away lately and like your ALWAYS MAD and you still can't put aside your attitude for US. I've been tired of US so many times and I been so close to leaving us behind. But you convinced me that you still want to be with me and work on US. Right now, I dont even feel like that anymore. It's still hard for me to trust you after what you did, but I let you have my complete trust. Why can't you do the same?? Idk..

Like forreals have you thought about all the shit I do? Like I wait for you soo long and I'm still by your side. I don't even wanna go out if you aint with me! And ain't no one gonna get inbetween us and you need to TRUST me. I've been showing you that since day one. I wouldn't have been so persistent and stuck through everything. I'm YOURS and only YOURS. You know you gotta put that shit to the side. I ain't your EX. Just cause he hurt you bad don't mean I WILL. Its fckin' holding our RELATIONSHIP back because when you say "okay I won't do that anymore" I KNOW you still feel that way and it ain't gonna change. Just fckin' let that shit GO. I AINT THAT BITCH NIGGA! TRUST ME

I don't even know why shit is been like this. I try to help you and work out our relationship, but your always mad. Then when I do what you ask of me, I'm not even doing it right. You know I feel like you don't even wanna be with me anymore. I feel like your just gonna leave and find someone else because your fckin tired of US. I feel like your just gonna give up and stop fighting because I can't do anything right. And you know you can't tell me that I need to stop having those negative thoughts that I'm fuckin' up. Because look how things end up. You tell me I'm not doing things right and I can't do such and such right. Thats why I feel like I'm fckin' up. So you know maybe if I actually felt like I was doing things in this relationship right I would be more positive, but look at US. Just argue, argue, and argue.

I just hope you don't GIVE up on ME.

When It Hurts, will we still be?
The same two lovers all over eachother
when it hurts, will we still see
what we got together
promise that we'll never, never ever be
temporary, ordinary
WE SHOULD CHANGE PEOPLES DEFINITION OF LOVE
so forget what you heard
the only way this will work
is if you love me when it hurts
can you love when it hurts?

Babygirl we gotta face it
There'll be times that we let each other down
And on the days that you ain't feeling me
Will you be able to stick around
Cause anything worth having is worth fighting for
If we really want this thing to work
We gotta go to war
Girl, I'm in this thing
I mean we're in this thing
But through the tears will you still be here





&; A TRUE Friend will be a friend regardless no matter what happens. I realized I still have a bestfriend. Amanda is the best, shes always there to vent to no matter what.

Hoooooooooookah

So yesterday, Karla and I went to Carmy's 4th Bday Party and just chilled. We left Fame's around 4ish then we went to roseville and swooped up Meeshell. Ended up going to galeria and copped some 2G tapers. Then we hookah'd at Jonah's Crib and burned. Pretty much my day lol








&


this video is fuckin' raw

ehhhhhhhhh

Trust (noun) - 1. reliance on the integrity, strength, ability, surety, etc., of a person or thing; confidence.
2. confident expectation of something; hope.
3. a person on whom or thing on which one relies: God is my trust.
4. to believe.

I believe trust is the key to any relationship... without trust a relationship is nothing. Would anyone like to agree wit a nigga?

im giving all i have.. and I want you to do the same. I put my complete trust in US thru everything. So I just hope you could do the same. I don't want to feel hella pushed away and shit. I hope it doesn't lead to that...

You alredy noe how I feel. It's just up to YOU & what you want to do about it.


OTHER;

Bored At SacSTATE Library

I Belive So...

I Am Soooooooooooooo going to halloween massive my girl chrys n my nigga corey got presales if ya tryna go hit me up ill contact my homies fa ya!

Zion I Snippets

too high to film the whole thing. i just got mostly what they sed and intro to the songs haha. pretty hyped performances tho

PaintBALLINNN'

Paintball Jungle At Vallejo, i have some fucking fat ass welts. got hit a few times.



& we came home hella tired. i "tried" sleeping but it didn't end up happening and me and karla had a sharpiie/marker fight in my room Lol

Jonah Lied To Me =(

Jonahhhhhhhhhhhhhh why you gotta lie to me telling me their shit is discounted

huuuuuuuuuuuurt hahaha


This is what happens when your bored on a saturday night.... You fuck around in Target





& It's Pimpin' Pimpin'

Thursday is College's Friday

I love thursdays. Me and karla went to go get tapex before fransteez's Haha my nigga fransteez had a lil kickback at his apartment. Shit wus coo but we left early cuz karla had work in the AM.

But today nothing really crackin.. So me n karla got tap ex and I did sum of my project on my laptop. We decided to go watch quarantine. Let me tell you... that shit is hella fuken scary haha. Its a good movie tho. Anyways we ending our friday night short its 11 and were at my crib right now weeeeak.

Kraaaaken.

Today we went to arden and kicked it with Daren, Michele, Jonah, &Bella. I was gonna buy some 2G gauges but i didnt wanna spend my money =( we ended up going to cobblestone and i payed n gyeeeah. ricky came thru and thats about it negro!

its almost 1am and i have to do hw... but im bout to say FUCK IT, and not even go to class tomorrow. i got to wake up at 730 in the morning you must be fuken kidding me lol. oh man.

oh & lets go to 24hour and work out whos down?

oh yeah and im at 4G gauges baybehhh!

Fuk Papers

Psychology sucks DICK nigga hahaha.

anyways this weekend wus pretty fuken boring, aint shit kraken.

oh & im at 6g now

Go Aunty Go Aunty Go.

Studying suuuuuuuuuuucks buhd. its almost 10 and i'm still in the library. hmmmmm.

-______-